Thursday night was a perfect night for Epicentre at 5. No one had work on Friday so everyone and their mothers were out in uptown. I went with some friends of mine who are dating, Gabby and Rick. Couples are not exactly the best companions for cruising men in suits, so we went to check out Howl first and met up with some of my friends from work.
The party was over by the time we left (so much for meeting any bankers). Gabby was headed back to the University area for a birthday party so I decided to stick with my coworkers. I suggested we meet some of my other friends at Alley Cats, but I was outvoted and dragged against my will to Suite.
Inside, the club was its usual loud overcrowded self, with random couples grinding. Does anyone else think it odd that people dance in the bar areas? There are dance floors for a reason. No need to rub up against each other while you’re trying to order a cocktail.
While we were standing with our drinks (because we can’t afford to sit), a creeper kept checking out my coworker Kara, who was there with her boyfriend. As soon as the BF went to the bar to get her a drink, this guy made his move. He had the best come-on I’ve ever heard:
Random Guy: “So, do you like it here?”
Kara: “Yea I do, this is my first time”
Random Guy: “I hate it here.”
Then he turned to me
“What about you?”
“Yea, it’s OK”
“Oh, I don’t like it”
Then he just stood around us awkwardly until Kara’s boyfriend came back. Charlotte men never cease to impress.
After we watched some of the waitresses dance, I convinced my coworker, Dave, to go to Alley Cats with me. When we got there I saw something that truly shocked me. The line was all the way down College to 7th street. Seriously? For Alley Cats? We decided to check the alley entrance and it was the same thing back there. I was there two weekends ago and it was dead – did I miss something?
I wasn’t worried though because my friend Skylar was already inside and promised that her friend, the bartender, could get us in for free. She met us at the VIP line and told the Bouncer, who was dressed in trendy hip hugging jeans and a black muscle shirt, that we were friends of the bartender, Aaron. He looked us up and down a couple times and said he’d never heard of him.
While we were waiting for Skylar to fetch Aaron, the Bouncer let in a large group of guys. This didn’t seem right to me, so I protested loudly. “How are you going to let a group of guys in and not me?” He looked at me again and shook his head. Turns out they were Bobcats. (I stick by my objection). Dave suggested I show the guy some leg, to which I replied that he would probably like to see Dave’s leg more. The Bouncer didn’t appreciate this and whispered to his friend, who then asked us to leave the line. So much for his tough bouncing skills.
By the time Aaron finally got outside we had been waiting awkwardly in the street for 15 minutes. He had long conversation with the Bouncer and then sent Skylar over to tell us that since we “talked so much shit” to the Bouncer, we weren’t allowed inside. Forbidden from Alley Cats; that’s a new low.
But the night was not a total loss. About ten minutes later we met Aaron at the back entrance where a different bouncer, a skinny young guy with highlighted hair and a fedora, let us right in. Guess it just goes to show that you should never pick on a man who wears tighter jeans than you.
Lick
