So far today has been pretty nice, aside from the fact that the second person to wish me happy birthday was my dentist, Dr. Roznick (good guy).  This morning in lit class I brought up a quote that the teacher liked. This is the first time she has liked anything I said all semester. I’m awesome! Then I ate lunch with Nines at Bistro 49 on campus (the elusive casual dining restaurant in the student union). Texas Lexi called to wish me a Happy Birthday and then diagnosed me with synesthesia.  She was all, hey what color is January? Yellow. What color is February? Purple. What color is A? Red. What color is 6? Green. What color is August? Orange. Where is September?

Right there, duh.

I know, right?

And now I’m sitting on the couch with my laptop thinking about taking a napskies because hey I’m old now and according to websites and other surveys I’m 25-30, which means I have more in common with people who have houses and careers and kids then with people going to keggers every weekend.  Hold on, I just got depressed.

The point of all this rambling is that I hope you either love me or pity me enough to give me the best birthday present ever…by clicking the link below and voting for me in the best “blogger” category for this year’s Charlotte Magazine Best of the Best awards. I’m not even asking for your vote on best local blog because we all know I won’t be getting it.  But maybe, just maybe, I can win blogger. I mean I’m 25. I’m unemployed. This is my extracurricular activity and maybe the closest I’ll ever get to being published. I NEED this.  I mean, this is my birthday. And I told you about my brazilian for god’s sake. And how I’m actually 41 according to Wii fit. And I took your beatings after I hated Macs. And I let Matt Tyndall make fun of me.  And I wrote for CLTblog. Heck, I even gave you “Disco Chicken“.  I earned this.  Right? Right?! Awww hell.

Vote for Me(ck)! ….. please?

UPDATE: today my wii fit age is…. 20. Suck it, losers!

2. Besides, what’s going on in Charlotte? I know I’ve been gone for 10 days so that doesn’t help – but ever since my “reduction in force” departure from uptown I feel completely disconnected from the city. University city isn’t Charlotte. All I know about up here is the going rate for Chai lattes at Ritazzas, 9am traffic patterns on highway 49, and how much my lit teacher wants me to drop out of the program. I need something to blog about. Send me ideas.I’m going to start making stuff up. Let me live my life vicariously through you. Please. Help! I need a study break. Or a nap.

3. Vancouver is awesome. Charlotte could learn a lot about Vancouver, like how to be prettier by incorporating mountains and ocean into the landscape. Also, how to make french fries more awesome with gravy and cheese curds. Also, transit?

4. I still don’t have a job. This, in addition to my classes and Wii fit, is doing wonders for my self esteem. Those “seeking entertainer” ads on craigslist are looking better and better. Even if that means more workouts and trips to Brazil.

5. My phone contract is up and I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching lately as to whether or not I could be a iphone/droid/nexusone/blackberry person. On the one hand, I don’t want to introduce the possibility of being a tweeting, emailing, foursquaring douchebag into my life 24/7. And I don’t want to pay $30 a month for data. On the other hand, ooooooo shiny phones so pretty.  I am certain that I could be a Nokia 5100 person with a yellow cactus faceplate (I had this phone until 2004). But sadly, this is not an option. For nowI guess I’ll have to settle on being a person who is sick of sending money to Verizon.

The first game I played was basic hula-hoop which I failed about halfway through. This might not be too terrible, had it not been freaking hula-hoop and had I not trained in ballet almost every day from the age of 3 through 19. You think somewhere in there I might have gained enough skill to move my hips in “wide even circles” for a minute straight. Sadly, no. Ballet is not rhythmic gymnastics.  Or, as a soon found out, preparation for any kind of balance test.

this is me. minus 37 spins and the two extra hoops.

Next I played a strange zen balance game with a candle, in which I sat cross legged on the balance board and tried to quiet the flame by being perfectly still. This I failed about 40 seconds in.

I tried basic step aerobics and passed with a 1 calorie star and then basic run, where I finally achieved the 2 star “calorie roaster” rating.

Okay, so as I’m typing this out I realize that I sound extremely pathetic. Which I’m not debating. I wasn’t taking the workouts that seriously at the time. I’m not really competitive by nature, and I was approaching each game as a happy diversion to the shitpile of schoolwork waiting in the other room. But as each game ended with another mediocre or worse performance by yours truly, I kept thinking back to one of those regrettable conversations I had with my boyfriend in which he noticed, casually, and for the sake of complete and total honesty with one another, that I may be just a little, ahem, bigger than I was, um, when we first started dating. And since we haven’t even been dating for an entire year yet, I started thinking that maybe I should put some extra hustle into each workout, and maybe, probably, turn the wii fit on more often, like, idk, every single day for the rest of my life?!

Then Turbo was all, hey do you want to create a profile so you can earn fitness credits, and I was all, of course, um, yea, totally, I should really start keeping track of this. And that’s when Wii fit turned into a little bitch.

Wii fit:  Hey let’s test your posture!

Me: Okay, like this?

Wii fit: Woa bitch, you lean to left. Stop doing that.

Meck: Okay okay.  Don’t take it personally.

Wii Fit: Now enter your height

Meck: 5′9″

Wii Fit: Your BMI is 20, that’s normal.

Meck: Hey, you’re not so bad.

Wii Fit: A healthy weight for you is 148.

Meck: That’s more than I weigh now! take that noticing boyfriend.

Wii Fit: Now do this balance test

Meck: Woa, what’s happening. This test is weird and hard.

Wii Fit: You were a dancer! You should be able to balance!

Meck: I don’t know which way to lean!

Wii Fit: FAILED!

Meck: but…

Wii Fit: Your wii fit age is…calculating…

Meck’s Mii: *clutching stomach* ooooo i don’t want to knowwwww

Wii fit: 41!

Meck: WTF?!

Meck’s Mii: ow, my back hurts

Turbo, of course, thought this was hilarious. Her Wii fit age was 28. As soon as our boyfriends returned we made each of them set up a profile. Her boyfriend’s Wii fit age was 29. My boyfriend’s was 37. I am the oldest Wii fit person in the household.This fact probably wouldn’t be so depressing if I wasn’t twenty-some days away from my 25th birthday.

So I’ve resigned myself to a goal of getting my Wii fit age to match my real age by my birthday. Even if that means practicing my balance every f’ing day. Which will probably be pretty tough for me since, as Wii fit so kindly pointed out, balancing, uh, is not my forte.